So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
Randomize
