I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
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