sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
