Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
