my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
Small penises have feelings too.
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
