i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
Sorry my hands just texted you
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
