so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
You know what would have been funny if we got arrested last night? The inventory search of the lock box:\n\nContents:\n1 work ID\n1 33 round Glock magazine\n1 set of keys\n1 vibrator\n2 bags fruit snacks\n1 parking hang tag
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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