Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
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