Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
two words: eviction party
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Randomize
