Jerry, you need to find god
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
