i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
where does the pee come out of this thing
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Randomize
