He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
