He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Randomize