we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Randomize
