I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
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