After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Randomize