What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
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