Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
Randomize
