she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Randomize
