I swear to god I'm with a high end prostitute right now and shes the most interesting person I've ever met. She just took me in to share an evening.
And as an added bonus she seems to have gotten a blood stain out of my favorite t-shirt
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
