i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Randomize
