You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
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