I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
Randomize
