Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
Randomize
