It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
Randomize
