if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
Randomize
