I think I am morally bankrupt
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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