I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
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