So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
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