I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
Damn victory sex feels great
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
Randomize
