What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
Randomize
