dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
Randomize