He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
I showed him my bush... on skype.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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