I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Randomize
