butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
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