found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Randomize
