Betty ford says i'm here all night
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
