I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
Randomize