yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize