so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
Santa Claus winked at me two tables over at the Chinese place tonight I was almost afraid he knew "getting laid" was my Christmas wish
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
