Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Randomize
