We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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