well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
