Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
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