Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize
