Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Randomize
