I am puke
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
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