theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
Randomize
