i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
I party with great urgency now.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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