we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
Randomize
